I'm in a serious relationship with my Chinese girlfriend, Linjie. I've just moved to another city in China, Hangzhou, and rented out a tiny room with a tiny attached kitchen and an adjoining and giant bathroom with a brand new western toilet (my requirements for a living space all reside in the bathroom). I haven't done any art for art's sake in a while nor visited DA in a while. But I've come today just to let you all know that I cannot be a vegetarian. I was at my Linjie's uncle's for their celebration of a new addition to the house (a very big celebration), and I ate their food after watching it being prepared -- thus I know I can't be a vegetarian:

Shushu (Linjie's uncle) woke me up by yelling into the room that I should get up and eat -- pleasant... I did all the morning teeth and face essentials, nibbled a bit (Chinese breakfast is not something to get excited about -- cold rice porridge and big sticks of empty fried batter. Later, Shushu called me back from my ambling and told me to help prepare for the giant lunch. And this is when I experienced more than I ever thought I would in one day:

At first I was a bit lost, the main sunlit area that all the houses faced inward toward was full of stuff and people I didn't recognize, all preparing for a feast. I didn't know how to help, so I found Mo Lian (pseudo-adopted teenager) and Lin Jin (cousin who is a soldier) and followed them around being as useful as I could, which amounts to pouring water into a basin for their "activity": using chopsticks to twirl out the organs of several eels lying dead in a tin basin on the concrete floor. Lin Jin was more skilled than Mo Lian, so I'll describe the soldier's process -- with a knife he would make a deep slit below the head and at the butt-hole, then shove two chopsticks through from one end to the other, twists the sticks with all his might, then pull them out from the butt-hole along with the mass of eel organs wrapped tightly about the utensils. Yea.

So, then Shushu called Mo Lian for something, but Mo Lian passed the yet unknown responsibility to me. Fortunately it was just moving tables from several rooms about to the area of mass activity. Others were preparing plates and dishes, two butchers were whacking away at pig feet and intestines, but most were squatting on the floor over tin and plastic basins and pooping -- ok, joking -- they are squatting next to tin and plastic basins and de-feathering birds, or cleaning fish, or cracking open live crabs, etc. After the table moving, I stood next to Mo Lian who was watching an activity that was worth watching: Linjie's brother "Lean Bean" (this is how is name is pronounced and he is conveniently rather skinny) had a tin of dead sea turtles at his butchers block. He chopped of their heads, severed open their soft shells, then tossed them into another basin. I watched him do every turtle with not a word to say. My only thought was, I probably shouldn't take pictures and show my family because it might be too much for some.

I took a break from the event I'd just witnessed and went to help Linjie's elementary school classmate and friend clean the shells of some small mollusks. Very good eats these; they each have two narrow oblong shells that clasp their body like the bread of a sandwhich. Their body is pale yellow and has two thicks tendrils protruding from the front. Not sure whether these are head appendages or butt prongs, nor do I know the English or Chinese name, but I can discuss them with Linjie because we refer to them as "that seafood with (at this point we hold two curved fingers up to represent the appendages)". And then the old man next to us cracking crab shells was given a black garbage bag that seemed to bulge on it's own...

He opened the bag just enough to shove his hand in, he wriggled a bit, then pulled out a live frog. And without hesitation, slammed the writhing creature against the concrete floor with a thud. It bounced from the impact and landed, twitching its little green legs. Linjie's girly classmate screamed while Mo Lian and I and other the other men just stared at the dead frog. Then the old man tossed it into a basin, it landed with several leg twitches. He nabbed another frog from the black bag, and slammed it agaisnt the concrete. A tiny piece of it's body flew through the air and stuck to the girl's leg, and another piece on her face. We laughed as she squeeled. Then a large Chinese man takes the bag and walks over to a long stretch of floor that nobody's using and slams a frog down. Now that we are standing and slamming frogs, they bounce much higher and further. The old man is too excited and takes the bag and starts slamming rapid fire, assaulting the floor with amphibians, cackling with each thud. Frogs fly across the floor, hitting table legs and walls, and I and the men just watch in a sick gaze at the wickedness.

After that I decided it was time to take a break... I thoroughly washed my hands of the mollusk shell dirt and the eel water and looked to see what was going on elsewhere, which was not much. So I returned and helped several people strip white stuff from the pig stomachs. After that I got up and walked around and saw a butcher chopping off frog heads and and legs and cleaving the body-less legs at the groin and I'd decided to go upstairs and sleep. Just too much new visuals in one day.

When lunch was finally served, I ate the eel, and endangered sea turtle (I don't know if it's endangered, I just say that to piss someone off), and the crab, and the frog. I didn't go after the pig organs because I've tried enough various animals' various organs to know that organs are organs and meat is meat, only the latter should be eaten.

My Chinese is not perfect, but I know how to ask where North is. I'm on the side of the street waiting for girlfriend's company car, when I decide I'd like to be sure I'm on the correct side of the street. Linjie (leen' jee-eh) text-replies that I need to be on the west side—Great! But where is West... Now, we could focus on my idiocy in that I didn't just look at the sun, but then we miss the funny dialogue between me and the Chinese motorcycle-taxi guy:

Wes: Sorry to trouble you, which way is North?
Him: We're on the North side (of the city).
Wes: Ok...
Him: Where do you want to go?
Wes: I want to be here. I don't want to go anywhere. I want to know where North is.
Him: You don't need to go North. We're on the north side (of the city).
Wes: Yeah, ok. Let's try this a different way. I want to walk in the direction of North.
Him: Huh?
Wes: ...If I I wanted to walk to Beijing, to north China, which direction would I go?
Him: Well, you would take a plane.
Wes: And which direction would the plane go?
Him: To Beijing...
Wes: Yes. You're right, so which way is Beijing.
Him: You should take a plane to Beijing. The airport is that direction.

I'm going to kill every fucking child and car horn and disgruntled husband in this city if they don't stop wailing for no god damn reason! These buildings were built to echo the hell-conceived sounds of vexation I am so tortured with all day long!

And they sure as hell better not bring out the blasted fireworks! It's not even near Chinese new year yet! At some point doesn't one get tired of the inane thrill of a loud boom in the sky? I swear the Chinese are all caveman. They spit and litter in the street, sidewalk, restaurant, etc. Their language has triple the amount of words we have to express grunts and moans and otherwise zoological sounds.

And they do something I dare call "bathe" in what is less a restroom, and more of a tiled cave supplied with un-drinkable water from rusted pipes; a dank hole insulated with their own body filth from years of neglecting to use the mop they've neglected to clean; a vomit-inducing cubicle whose horrid decor glistens with discoloration from the butchered sunlight coming through glass covered on the inside with old magazine pages and on the outside with prehistoric sediment all placed in what could be called a window if there was anything to see out of it besides the identical incubation of disease in the building five feet away.

Yeah so, I'm really glad I have a girl. Or else I'd be un-happy here.

_{I will admit they have some great street food, but I happen to have not gone outside yet today.}

Is he the one in the bamboo hat? Is that him buying tea? Maybe he's the one next to the cute girl at the top right of the page...

S t o r y
I haven't been doing any art lately. Maybe later. I finished my year of study in Beijing (Siberian weather, gray scenery, too many foreigners). I am still living in China, but now just across from Taiwan. I'll be starting college again sometime, but this time in China.

G i r l s
I love Kiki, but our lives are still too separate too make anything happen. "Orange" is in Indonesia with a long time friend turned mate. I am happy for her. Zuo Jian is lonely and calling for me, but I am occupied...

An intriguing tale of seeming betrayal, unexpected attraction, and rare honesty is unfolding right now. Too few chapters have been written for me to say anymore.

_{Always be honest with girls and you will be rewarded.}

F o o d
Yes, China eats weird stuff. I admit that half the food in this country was not meant for humans to consume (intestine, rotten tofu, brain), but the other half are surprising new tastes I can't believe I've lived without before:

Take steamed buns, for instance — the bliss of pure bread, combined with the soft warmth of something steamed. And "veggie-oil cakes": imagine egg-rolls in small pancake form that have much more oil and are not crunchy.

And my favorite, which I can only describe as spicy peanut balls that are much like corn nuts in appearance and appeal: they suck at first, but then you get addicted. Oh, and some new tiny buns I recently tried: the inside has a delicious goo that tastes like softer peanut-butter: supposedly the goo is made from lotus root, who-da-thunk-it!

Finally, peanut-butter noodles: the peanut-butter, thin flat noodles, and big strips of lettuce are cooked in steaming water (that's also got the flavor of the dumplings also cooked in it): sounds weird, but it's very satisfying and filling.

P l u g

Teralis (twalrpg.net/teralis)
Forums of TwalRPG (To Wield A Legend)
Expound on the tales of your warriors and weapons in an ancient world of original fantasy!

Teralis (http://twalrpg.net/teralis)
of TwalRPG (To Wield A Legend)

I and have a website. This free-form role-play is where many of my favorite characters (Yaush, Kyra, Ziet, Toji) come from. Some may remember a beta testing once before, but now we are ready to open her up properly.

Teralis is open. She is the role-play forum where the adventures are yours: http://twalrpg.net/teralis. Teralis is a completed third of a extensive text-based rpg under construction -- one that is a unique mix of character-driven story and user-created goodness.

Teralis is an ancient world of fantasy, before industry and guns. Men may be prevalent, but elves, dwarves, wizards, anthros, demons, spirits, and so forth have just as much a role. The world is far from explored, and what of it has been settled is in the form of villages, towns, citystates, castles, et cetera. Teralis is home to cultures similar to those you may know from your world, and cultures you've yet to imagine. Magic, sorcery, voodoo, qi/chi/ki, mana and the like are present and as varied in their following and use as they are in name. In essence, it is an endless adventure defined by those who live it.

The focus of these forums is to expound on the tales of the warriors of this world, the adventures they share, and the weapons they use -- the legends they wield. Every character in this rpg is a unique creation of its user. Forums exist to suit those who wish to role-play published characters, this is not one of those forums. Users should take pride in their character, and accept those that others have created. Teralis was built to encourage creativity and support originality in the realm of fantasy (which has become limited in its variety and littered with clones).

But don't be anxious. You needn't deliberate over a character before joining. New characters tend to develop a personality and history the more you write with them; that in fact is what makes this type of role-play so intriguing -- watching the characters and writing of you and others evolve, and recognizing your role in the process.